pet names

So I was watching Eat, Pray, Love a few weeks ago and I love how Javier Bardem's character (who is swoon worthy by the way) calls his son "darling" throughout the film. It's so sweet and honest. While watching the movie I had an idea, I was going to start calling myself darling.

Here's the thing. I'm kind of an asshole to myself. Like a lot. I am so mean to myself it's ridiculous! Learning to love myself is the main thing I am working on these days and breaking those old habits. So I realized that it's a lot harder to say something mean to myself when I address myself as "darling".

I've tried it here and there, and am going to try it more. It's weird and interesting, and it pretty much works (so far). It takes my mean-to-myself habits and throws them for a loop. Before I think "You look horrible today!" I add "darling" and then the entire sentence sounds kind of like a joke and makes me smile or I skip it altogether and just say "darling". I think, 'Good lord, why am I so fucking hard on myself?' It gives me pause. A chance for my brain to catch up to my destructive emotional responses.

Darling is one of my favorite pet names. But any name that has a loving connotation for you will do. Baby, sweet, cupcake, lemon drop, you know...I could list pet names for days. But the point is be loving to yourself. The way you address yourself is important, the way you treat yourself is important. I can't stress that enough. The dialogue you have with yourself is so important, in fact it's critical to your entire life. It can affect every aspect of your life either negatively or positively. And once you go down that negative path, it's damn hard to turn it around.

Let's love ourselves. Everyone deserves love and love begins within us. Someone somewhere started a rumor that if you were nice to yourself, you were vain, if you liked yourself, you were a bitch. That's all bullshit. By loving yourself you are equipping yourself to love others. You are coming from a place of love. If our bodies are a temple, I want mine to be filled with love.

xo, C


this wild life

A vintage Paris painting for our bathroom.

Oh my word, things have been wild! We are renovating both our bathrooms, and the exterior of our house is being repaired and painted. Not only is my anxiety running wild (having people in our house is a huge trigger for me), but we have also had some issues with our contractors communicating with us, and things have been up and down in that regard. 

One of the good things is that the design has been 100% in my control. I picked every feature of the bathrooms, and the paint colors for the exterior. Our guest bathroom is going to have a mid century modern feel, and our master bath is going to have a 1920s/bohemian feel. I am thrilled about both and can't wait to see the finished product. I have ordered most things online so am hoping that the vision I have in my head is accurate and that everything will go together!

I'm realizing that during this time I really have to work on self-care. First of all, getting a bathtub and these renovations done is a huge part of self-care on it's own. I haven't had a bathtub that worked for seven years! It's going to help reduce my anxiety as well as my fibromyalgia pain. We also had some issues with dry rot that I'm sure wasn't good for our health. And driving up to a pretty exterior is going to be fantastic! 

My self-care routine includes the following...Each morning I shower and throw on a cozy dress and some mascara. I tidy the house, light candles and make a list of plans for the day. Mainly I sit around watching movies as I am trying to keep our crazy dog Cricket who barks most of the day calm, so spending time cuddling pups is a big priority. I've also baked most days (today chocolate crinkle cookies), and plan a simple dinner. Each night I take Melatonin to help reduce my anxiety enough so I can sleep.

One other thing I set up today is my aromatherapy diffuser. It fills the room with essential oil pretty fast and I can run it all day. I usually blend my own water with lavender, frankincense (one of my favorites!), and rose oil. 

Having an anxiety disorder and four nervous dogs isn't fun during stressful things like this. I am doing my best to hold it together, but it's rough. I know in the end it will be worth it! Can't wait to take a bath with a fancy Lush bath bomb!

My next post will be about how the way we care and set up our home really affects our state of mind and can be a form of self-love. I'll share some fun ideas and thoughts. So stay tuned!

xo, C



I read a quote a few months ago that said "Combat anxiety with gratitude." That really stuck with me as this has been quite an anxious year for me. When my mind is focused on looking at the things I am grateful for in anxious moments, I see that things work out sometimes, that I have people who love me, that there is hope and good in the world. 

I'm really focused this Thanksgiving on seeing the good in life. There is a lot to be thankful for. Even when I was in the throws of depression, I could write pages on things that were good. Even in the worst moments, there is good. 

I think about our world, and we need the good so much right now. Maybe if we all fill our hearts with gratitude and hope it will spill over to the people around us. If we can give just a person or two a good moment, it has the possibility to change more than just those few seconds.

Let's start the kindness and gratitude within ourselves and then pass it on to others. Write a gratitude list (I call them "good things lists"), tell someone how much they mean to you, be kind to yourself today, tell yourself how valuable you are. 

Here are a few things on my good things list:

This is my first Thanksgiving depression free in ten years!

I'm so lucky to have my husband R be my best friend too.

Our four pups who are wild, and work, and wonderful.

The red leaved trees in our neighborhood that are so beautiful.

Cold nights with warm fires.


What are some things you are grateful for?

xo, C


gifting with love

Hi Loves!

The holidays are coming and I am really excited. This is my favorite time of the year for sure. I think we often get caught up in the hustle and the 'must do' that we forget to make the holidays about peace and love. When I give gifts I want them to be from the heart, rather than from a wish-list. I want to give gifts to show affection and tenderness rather than out of a sense of obligation. 

I really like the idea of making something by hand for friends and family for the holidays. Whether it's baking pies, giving a plant, or sewing a goodie, these are all fun ways to show you care. Another thing I love is giving your time. We get so caught up in doing our own thing, what if you set up a day out with your niece or a beach adventure with one of your girlfriends? I also think donations are great and supporting artists worldwide. Here are a few of my holiday gift ideas!

Lavender sachet DIY
Homemade lavender sachets. Not only are these super cute, 
they are functional, and the scent is so relaxing! 
Such a great goodie to give!

glitter plant pots DIY
I love these glitter plant pots, I am such a plant lady so 
I'm a sucker for all things green and living! Succulents are a 
great option to put in these pots for gifts, easy to keep alive even if you
don't have a green thumb!

Kitty eye mask DIY
This kitten eye mask is just too cute! What a great goodie for a new mom,
busy friend, or someone who travels a lot.

Sudara Clothing
This is an awesome clothing shop! It is run by Indian women who want
to fight going into the sex trade. They specialize in pjs, and the clothes look so comfy!

Give to Syrian refugees
The crisis in Syria is real and tragic. I think most of us get overwhelmed
by it and don't know what to do. The best thing we can do is give money to 
charities like UNICEF. This link takes you directly to help Syrian children. 
Even if you can only give $10 or $20, it will make a difference!


If you want to be a little extravagant this season you can even combine some of these gifts. Eye mask, pjs, and a girls night in date! Or a plant and a promise for hope for the Syrian refugees.

This year let's try not to give out of obligation. When we give out of obligation or without intention it can really cause us to lose the whole point of the holidays, which is connection, love, peace, and rest. It is a pause. A time to reflect on what we have and to be thankful. A time to show appreciation to the people we love. Your gift doesn't even have to be handmade or charitable. What matters is the thoughtfulness and love you put into it!

xo, C


The reveal

Welcome to the new Life Collection! I'm so glad you're here! I reimagined this space after getting pretty burnt out with my old way of blogging, which was basically posting here and there about whatever I felt like at the time. I really lost my direction and thought about giving it up. Then after a bout of loneliness I came up with a new vision for this space, and I am so excited about to share it with you!

I want Life Collection to be a kindness blog. Not just kindness to those around us, but kindness toward ourselves. I have learned that loving yourself first is the real key to being able to have empathy and compassion for those around us. This is where the tag line "love you, love all" comes in. I think if we love ourselves it gives us the capacity to love everyone around us.

I want to share my own journey toward self-love (which I'm still working on intensely), tips and ideas for caring for ourselves and those around us, and just about anything and everything loving and kind.
I hope Life Collection is a positive space where we can share our own kindness stories. I want to get more interactive and maybe I'll even share some guest posts. I want us to talk about happiness, joy, good things. We talk about feeling positive emotions, but what do those emotions look like? What triggers them? What is a good day for you? For me? For those around us? I'm sure it is diverse, and that is exciting!

We see so much tragedy in the world and it's devastating. What can we do about it? We can get bitter, or we can get compassionate! Let's choose kindness! Let's sprinkle compassion around like confetti! Let's do our best to make even one person's day better and see where it goes!

Thanks for being here! Let's do this!

xo, C


changes are coming!

Hi Love,

A few weeks ago I had a new idea for the direction of Life Collection. I've been blogging for years all over the internet and lately I feel so flat and pointless about it. I have been posting less and less and feeling lost. So it's time for a change!

I'm really excited about the new vision I am developing and am going to do a total overhaul- from design, to post topics, and the whole purpose of the blog. I want my blog to exist not just as an online diary, but as something helpful to my readers, as an inspirational and purposeful space.

So stay tuned. I'll post on social media when the big reveal happens. It will probably be sometime in late November.

Looking forward to joining you in the redesigned space!

xo, C


lonely hermit

Hi Dolls,

I've been a lonely hermit these days. Holy shit loneliness is the worst. I had an extremely lonely childhood and I find that it has followed me into my adult years. I have been withdrawing like crazy and that makes it so much worse.

I've had a few weeks of low energy along with a fibro flare which just ruined me. I could hardly shower and actually used a garden chair in the shower just to be able to bathe! It was pretty ridiculous but I'm starting to feel better (even went for a walk this morning). 

I have so many things I am looking forward and wanting to do but I'm dealing with a lot of psychological and emotional issues as well as anxiety. It's really holding me back. But I'm doing my absolute best to move forward and not creep back into depression.

I'm realizing more and more that I love living a simple life and if my emotional and health issues would just ease up a bit I could really get to a content place. I love quiet days and doing little creative projects. Gardening, cooking, snuggling pups, reading, writing notes, these are all my favorites and I have the opportunity to do those things, which is great! But my main focus is getting better health wise, and it's so difficult, but that's ok. It's happening, slowly but surely. 

I'm hoping to come back to this space more and have a few posts in the works, so stick around.

xo, C


slow down

Hi Dears,

Nothing like being sick to remind me to slow down. I have an appointment with my doctor to see what's wrong. Hopefully I'll be back on my feet soon as being sick isn't the best form of rest!

But I am trying to take things slower. I have time to myself and I'm not depressed! After ten years of consistent depression, it's amazing to have gone three months depression free! I am so happy and working even harder in therapy to continue to grow and improve. I'm so excited about what is to come.

Right now my main focus creatively is being a plant lady. I am propagating succulents and growing them in vintage bowls and cups. I'm hoping to get enough going so I can sell them at a swap meet. It will take months and months to get there, but it's a fun goal! 

I'm also going to get back to writing. I became really discouraged after not getting any feedback from some writers who offered to help. It really destroyed my confidence. But I have to get back to it. There is a new cafe' open downtown that has a lot of quiet little booths that would be great to write in. So I'm going to try my luck at it once a week.

I'm doing my best to enjoy the little things. Growing leaves, puppy barks, the tiny changes in the weather, the way R's hand feels in mine. It's good. And for now it's vitamin c and lots of tea to get me back in ship-shape!

xo, C


it goes on...


Hi Doves,

So I am no longer a "working girl". I put my notice in yesterday. I'm finishing up a few projects and then that will be that. Sometimes I wish it was easier for me to feel settled and happy in a work situation, but this time around it wasn't a match. I was also working with family and I learned that mixing personal relationships with professional ones is just not my cup of tea. In the end it's no ones fault, it just wasn't the right fit.

I have some ideas of what I want to do next but I'm sort of exploring it and taking my time. I am going to take some "home life" time. We have a lot of renovations that need to be scheduled and moved forward on. I am also going to take some craft classes, hoping for baking and sewing ones! One day I want to write poetry again without panicking while I stare at a blank screen.

I also have to work on re-building the garden (one of our dogs had to be hospitalized from eating corn in the garden! Luckily she is healing!). I need to put a gate around it to keep the pups out and move it to a different spot in the yard. I also have been propagating succulents and love it, but I need to get more going. I need more window space and have been wracking my brain for ideas on how I can put more plants in the house. My craft desk is now going to be a "plant nursery"! 

I have this whole bohemian life dream where I live simply and quietly and contentedly. The two most important things for me are freedom and congruence. Freedom to be myself, freedom to love and care, freedom to express. I also want congruence, for my internal life to match and sync up with my external life. When I am living that way I am genuinely happy and it feels great. So that is what I'm moving towards. More congruence. More freedom. Like Jane Austen, I have to make my own way. 

xo, C


Twelve Years

Sunday was our 12 year anniversary. We went on a simple date and talked about love and the past and future. It was so nice. I baked a rainbow chip cake that fell apart and we ate way too much before throwing it away at bed time.

Marriage hasn't been what I expected at all. Dealing with illness and life and death situations from day one wasn't in my childhood dreams of being a wife. But somehow we have stuck together and it has brought us closer as we have fought in the trenches. We have gone to the very end of hope and are still fighting. Things are getting a lot better and with that comes a lot of excitement and dreaming.

Regardless of how sick I have been, Ronald has always been a bright spot in my life. Many times the only bright spot. I am so thankful for him and his love for me. Even on the worst days we can find something to laugh about. We have fought hard to get here, now let's celebrate!

xo, C


and the thoughts behind my thoughts...

This is kind of a triggering topic for me but I want to talk about weight and how the way we discuss it as women is really unhealthy and bringing us down. 

We are constantly shown images of women who are deemed perfect and imperfect. At the market check out, five different magazine covers shout out at us with ways to lose 10 pounds in 10 days, etc. The National Enquirer tears apart an actress in a bikini who has cellulite "you won't believe who this is!". What a horrible person! Showing the world "cottage cheese" thighs! The media tears apart women's bodies, and this affects all of us. It objectifies us, it affects little girls who should be playing with dolls instead of comparing their size with their friends. It causes eating disorders and shame.

I decided years ago to stop joining in the perpetuation of this whole nonsense idea that our bodies need to be judged. I am not going to join in the tear down of women. The tear down of my friends, and loved ones. I refuse to discuss it, I stand up against it. Its been a tough road to get here. 

I used to talk about it a lot, and feel guilty if I didn't make up an excuse for eating something when I was with people (especially women). How many of these lines sound familiar? "Oh well I worked out today so I've earned this piece of cake.", "Oh I should't eat anymore, but it's so good!", "I'll work it off tomorrow.", "I hardly ate anything today, so it's ok." Why do we need permission to eat food? I don't see guys doing this. Someone convinced us that we need to earn food and make excuses. No one has the right to do that. And the thing is, every time we say one of the sentences above, we are digging ourselves and our fellow ladies into a bigger hole!

I'm so over it. Holy shit, we should all be so pissed and so over it! No one should make us feel shame about our bodies...no matter what size we are, big or small.

I am my own worst critic. I remember at 4 years old feeling fat and worrying more about my weight than anything else. I would workout obsessively at ten (1,000 steps on a stair machine sounds weird for a ten year old, right?), I watched my mom eat only chicken broth for days on end and felt like if I only had more self control I could do that too. I have had disordered eating most of my life, and guess what? I'm fucking over it!

It takes a very conscious effort. The first step I took was working to not judge anyone on appearance no matter what. Not on their size, not on their clothes, or anything appearance wise. When I saw someone dressed in something I wasn't used to seeing or personally didn't think matched or I thought they "shouldn't" be wearing, I would tell myself that they really looked happy or have such interesting taste. If I saw someone that was a size I wasn't used to seeing, I would look at them with curiosity and a sense of openness rather than judgment. 

The next step was finding something I really liked appearance wise of all these people. "Look at that cool purse!", "Wow, her eyes are beautiful!" At this point I didn't have the ability to see anything kick ass in my appearance, but this exercise gave me the opportunity to grow in my acceptance of other women which spilled into my acceptance of myself. 

Then I started getting a bit daring and working on my judgement towards myself. Instead of wearing clothes to hide my body, I bought dresses and jewelry I really loved. I realized I should wear clothes that are soft and good quality, that make me feel bad ass and confident, whether its sweatpants, jeans, or dresses, whatever we feel good in is what we should wear. It was scary. After a while I wore heels (even sprained my ankle in them!), and in the last few months I started to wear red lipstick ever day and high wasted skirts that show a bit of my tummy. This is all scary as fuck mind you, I still feel like shit for a bit each day, I still feel ashamed of my body. But I'm working on it.

Now all this shit took (is taking) years. I mean fucking years. I still have a hard time with it daily, but undoing almost 30 years of bullshit is a really long and difficult process. But guess what? It's worth it!

I feel so much better, ladies. Call bullshit on the things we are told to believe, that little-big thought in our head that we aren't good enough. "The thought behind the thought" that tells us something is wrong with us. 

I am happy talking about healthy eating, working out, and all that. But I'm done taking that negative spin that I/we currently aren't good enough. That once we reach some size goal we will be more valuable or attractive. I'm done acting like my size, what I eat, or how much I move is a direct reflection of my value as a human being. That is such a crock of shit. Seriously!

So here's the challenge: next time you're out with your gal pals don't make an excuse for eating something. Don't bring up weight or calories or diets. Just be. If someone brings a weight topic up, don't join in, change the subject or just sit quietly and wait for the moment to pass. This is the work we need to do to change our society. Sure, the media needs to change, they enrage me. But we are also actively participating in the spread of the lie that the shape of our body dictates our worth and should be judged. 

Let me know what you think! What are you doing to boost your self-esteem and those of the women in your life?

Love you darling!



things that make me smile

1. Pups stealing tomatoes from the garden, and thinking they are being sneaky.

2. Propagated succulents ready to be transplanted.

3. Harry Ham Bone acting like playing ball is the best thing in the world.

4. Being able to sleep with a lot less hip pain on our new mattress pad.

5. Waking up after nightmares and realizing they were just dreams.

6. Cooking at home more and making delicious comfort food.

7. Greek yogurt and double espresso.

8. Pedicures.

9. A new pillow and lamp that makes our living room feel more mid-century modern.

10. Plants. Any plants. Even weeds.

11. The sweet smell of tree sap and leaves near our house. Besides the ocean it is my favorite smell.

12. Red lipstick and skirts. I'm a skirt person now and I love it.

13. Ronald getting excited for the Mineral concert we are going to next week.

14. About to celebrate 12 years with that nerd. Pretty awesome.

15. The anniversary present I got that kid. I'm such a good gift giver (sick brag).

What are some things making you smile right now? Slow down and enjoy something simple. Take a deep breath. Even on the shittiest day there is at least one good thing. Look for it, and don't forget that it will be ok.

xo, C



Hi Loves!

A few years back I did a monthly-ish newsletter. I'm thinking about returning to that. I love blogging but it's also fun to have a little newsletter campaign where I can showcase things I am loving and general goodness. What do you all think? If you want to sign up, use the form below!



"Oh let's go back to the start"

Hi Dolls,

Things have been rough. I had a pretty big meltdown last week but am getting back on my feet. I've been so stressed. Hives, tummy aches, trouble sleeping, nightmares...all that stuff. It's really super not fun.

The weekend was pretty damn good. We cleaned out my pink dressing/craft room and all it needs is a little decorating and it will be ready for enjoyment! We also hung some spice racks and I am thrilled, which is kind of silly but spice racks are very exciting at the moment! I can't wait to show you all the changes and give you a tour of my dreamy pink room!

I'm dreaming of less stress. The ability to cope with all these changes and feel more in control. I have realized I am a highly sensitive person and don't cope as well with change, I also am more in tune with the emotions of others which is super overwhelming for me. I have all these weird experiences and I am now reading books about being highly sensitive and it has helped me so much! I was always ashamed at myself, thought I wasn't strong, etc. But now I realize my brain just works in a bit of a different way and that's ok. I seriously started crying while reading the first book because I finally felt like I wasn't alone. It's a very good thing.

So yes, I am hanging in and working hard. Trying to breathe and rest and not meltdown anymore than I have. 

xo, C


Learnings at 30

I've learned a lot in my thirties (and they've only just started!). It's amazing how clarity comes with age. That rumble busy worry of my twenties is fading out and I can live slowly and simply. Not all the time, but sometimes, and it's the best. I thought I would share a few of the things I have learned so far.

Nature is my biggest passion. Whether its cuddling the dogs, bird watching, caring for my plants, or going to the ocean. Those are the things that bring me back to myself and help me feel alive. I always downplayed how much nature meant to me. But now I want to sing songs about it and dance like a gypsy woman!

Don't take on the judgment of others, it's a weight I cannot carry. If I let it stop me from being myself, I will get incredibly depressed. Since I've "come out" I have experienced an amazing change in the way I live my life. I'm not as afraid anymore. I realize now, it wasn't the act of coming out, it was the act of standing up to my fear of judgement and then realizing that judgement looks like a terrible enormous monster, but it's really just a mirage. If you don't take it, it doesn't exist. That is easy to say,  extremely hard to live, but it's true.

It's ok to be a "bad girl". I learned at a young age that there were certain things women must do and not do. Wearing red lipstick, speaking up, looking sexy, or calling yourself a pinup or feminist were huge no-no's. Now I am proud to stand up for myself, to call myself a feminist and speak out on issues that matter, to wear short skirts, and red lipstick all day (holla!). It's great and I have found so much freedom in my self expression. I curse like a sailor and love telling dirty jokes. I used to panic that people would think I wasn't feminine. Then I remembered that I am me, and being myself matters more than any label on earth or anyone's opinion of me. I used to know that concept was true, but it was like a fact from a book, I didn't connect with it. Now I know it. I soul know, heart know, brain know, and that makes a big difference.

I don't care about what people think as much. Someone says I shouldn't eat a cookie? I eat the cookie if I want to. This shirt shows my back rolls? Who gives a fuck? Back rolls exist (and it's a Batman shirt so must wear). Someone disagrees with what I'm saying? That's cool, we can disagree and I don't have to worry about convincing them. Someone has a comment about the way I live my life. Ok---I can listen and if it isn't beneficial let it go. 

This is the ease of living in my thirties. It is soulful and I'm more in tune with myself than I have ever been. I am convinced that much of my depression has dissipated due to learning these lessons. They were hard things to learn, they are still hard to remember and live, but holy shit it's worth it to work hard to live a full life. 

If you are unhappy with the way you feel or how your life is going, don't just give in and settle, fight for the life you want, fight to feel good! You deserve it! If you don't know what's wrong or what to do, ask for help! Work on yourself and for what you want, it's so worth it. It's scary, but it's more scary to live a life unfulfilled. 

If you ever want to talk about life things, feels, whatever. I am always here (and I mean that), just send me a note and I'd love to chat with you!

I love this quote from Charles Bukowski. It kind of makes me want to cry...

"People are strange.
  They are constantly angered by trivial things,
  But on a major matter
  Like totally wasting their lives,
  They hardly seem to notice." 

xo, C


in and out

This afternoon I tidied our disaster-house here and there. Putting essential oils in a drawer, watering plants, making the bed. I love home, I love this nest.

I've been working for about a month now and I think I am getting the hang of it. I have been so stressed I have really let my internal life fall to the wayside. I stopped journaling, writing in my personal blog, and reading. It's time to start those things back up. I miss those things. I miss those simple moments. 

I know I keep talking about Mary Oliver, but oh fuck I love her. Reading just a few of her poems made me want to write again, take time to look at the stars at my 5 a.m. walk, and slow down and enjoy my espresso. Poetry is such a powerful inspiration to me. I need to remember that. Maybe poetry is my religion. Poetry and kindness...that sounds good.

This coming week I'm going to take myself on a date to my favorite little French Cafe'. Do some trudging in the garden, and read some damn books. I feel like I am slowing down to realize everything is ok, I don't need to constantly stress about whether I am doing ok at work, ok at life, etc. It is what it is, slow down and enjoy it.

xo, C


some words on love

Like and love are weird little worms. I love it. It's vulnerable and raw and scary as hell. Loving Ronald is the best thing I've ever done. The more I let my tender show, the more connected I feel, not just to him but to myself, to the earth, to the preciousness of the moment.

I'm not so great at being vulnerable and putting myself out there. The conundrum is that I am also a very open person, so to others it probably seems like I am being vulnerable, but really it is just the speech I carry, the words I muster to describe my weird life. Vulnerable is much harder to get at, that sticky squishy red heart stuff. But when I'm there, vulnerable, cracked shell, busted open apple, I feel alive. 

So here's to scary love, scary like, and the raw wonder of being exposed.

xo, C


When I Am Among the Trees


When I Am Among the Trees- Mary Oliver

When I am among the trees,
especially the willows and the honey locust,
equally the beech, the oaks and the pines,
they give off such hints of gladness.
I would almost say they save me, and daily.

I am so distant from the hope of myself,
in which I have goodness, and discernment,
and never hurry through the world
     but walk slowly, and bow often.

Around me the trees stir in their leaves
and call out "Stay awhile."
The light flows from their branches.

And they call again "It's simple," they say,
"and you too have come
into the world to do this, to go easy, to be filled
with light, and to shine."


Yesterday I wandered through the book store hunting. Hunting for the poetry section (which the bookstore moves constantly), only to find it nestled in the corner near the magazines and bathroom. Wide on the shelf, a fresh frosting of books spread in front of me. I found two by Mary Oliver, whose work makes me want to nature walk and hummingbird flutter. And Billy Collins, who is new to me but there is a dog on the cover so he is already in my good graces.

So this morning, up early, pain seething up and down my legs and spine from a damn incurable disease, I read this poem and it made me think of Yosemite and waving trees and that flick-flack song they sing to me when I sit on the swing in the yard on a breezy day, listening, sitting on the faded orange cushion, the pups wagging around, my garden set before me half dead, but half alive too, and I'm at home. At home in this world, at home in this tree. All is at peace.

xo, C


clothes and tattoo plans

So store credit is a lovely thing, especially when it has been way over 30 days! I had a bunch of things from Modcloth that didn't work and I finally got to the post office to ship them back. With the store credit I was able to get these three dresses and three skirts! Pretty excited. 

Skirts are a new thing for me, but I'm a big fan. I love that I'm able to wear cute t-shirts with them and dress it up with pearls or pretty earrings. It makes my wardrobe way more versatile which is nice. I also love how twirly the skirts are, I kind of want to spin in circles all day when I wear one!

This coming month I'm planning on getting some tattoos and maybe my tongue pierced. These are things I've wanted for ages and I am going to treat myself with my first paycheck! I am hoping I can get two shin tattoos and two little phrases above my knees. Not sure how far my money will stretch. I also want to get Ron a Lincoln tattoo. I'll keep you posted on how it goes...

xo, C


House tour part one: living room

I thought I would do a little house tour of some of my favorite rooms in our house. I had to use my phone as I can't find my DSLR plug in, so the pictures aren't the best.

I really love our living room. I recently redecorated the majority of the room to be more colorful. I love how the wall color is bright but with the even brighter colors layered on top it looks more like a neutral! I also am learning that if you do color right it can feel really fresh and not too busy, this room has a lot going on, but it also gets a lot of light and is so calming to me. 

I use a lot of white, coral, pale pinks, and blues. I really want to replace our couches (dreaming of this and this), but our hand-me-down sofas are pretty damn comfy even though they don't really fit with the room style. For now I keep them covered in white and blue quilts and that works.

A few things not pictured is our huge tv. I wanted a huge one and I seriously love it, so fun for movie night! Also not pictured are our fans, our stacks of books waiting to be donated, and all the dog toys, and dust bunnies. So yeah, we live here. I want my house to be lived in and not perfect. I forget that a lot and end up judging myself for mess which is just silly. Our space makes me happy and it doesn't have to be perfect to be wonderful. So yeah, I do have mess...lots of mess!

I'm really proud of this room. Out of all our rooms this one makes me the most happy and relaxed. What is your favorite room in your house? What is it about that room that makes it your favorite?

xo, C