5/1/18

"I see a red door and I want to paint it black"


black dress from Target Plus

black dress from Old Navy

black tote from Old Navy

So I got my haircut finally! I've been putting it off since September because staring at myself in the mirror while someone chops off my hair is just not my idea of a good time. I got a mullet and I love it! My hairdresser cut off over two-thirds of my hair! I thought it would take awhile to get used to but I haven't missed my long hair for a second! I feel so much more edgy and like myself. I also got my nose and septum pierced, and I ordered a few new pieces for my wardrobe.

Most of my clothes are very bright and colorful, I love it but I've been craving some black in my wardrobe for a long time. I found these two dresses and bag and I'm so excited! I love the little peep hole in the first dress! And both dresses are midi dresses but since I am so short they will fit me like a maxi dress which I love, so comfy! 

I know my depression is improving when I am taking time to take care of myself and express myself. Self-expression through fashion and things has always been super important to me even since I was a child. I had little opportunity to express myself in my child and teen years so I would wear unique things and do creative stuff constantly to help me feel individual and slightly in control of my life. Now I'm able to do that more and more and it really makes me happy. I love when I get dressed up and get my makeup just right to go out and have some fun. A lot of times people compliment me and ask if I am going somewhere fancy, and I get to tell them I am just going grocery shopping or to the craft store. 😂

On the depression front, I've gone on a new medication that is really helping. Its a tricyclic from the 50s and there are more risks taking it, but it sometimes works for people with really severe cases who haven't responded to the new types of medications out there. I was so scared to get on it, but it is helping me so much! I really hope it continues and am just trying to enjoy each day I feel less bad. I am still in it, still have a lot of work to do and still fight every day, but it's a little easier and I'm able to see hope in the future. 

I'll share more as time goes by. I really want to blog more and I think my next post will be about crafting. So keep an eye out!

xo, C


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