So I am reading
I Am That Girl and it's fantastic. I highly recommend it! It has some creative exercises in it and one I tried this morning was free-writing my dreams. It was so interesting to see the things that came up (like making homemade dog biscuits...what the what?!?!) when I was just going for it and not being held down by my circumstances or fears. I thought I would share what I wrote here. It's a bit of a mess but that is what free-writing is about, just getting it out there and going with your mind flow. So here it is, and I am pretty excited for the next step which is figuring out the steps I need to take to make these dreams a reality!
Dreamer:
I want to write for xo Jane or a feminist magazine, online or in print. I want to make things I love making and sell them or not, I want to make zines. I want to be a gardener, have a greenhouse and sell something at the Farmer’s market.
I want to take a baking class/cooking class. To help people with mental illness. To have a book on the shelves at Barnes and Noble and on a best seller list. I want to go to the coffee shop or sit in the backyard and write every day.
I want to live on a ranch and rehabilitate dogs and garden/farm, make homemade dog biscuits to sell. I want to live in a beach house in Pacific Grove and be an artist and writer/marine biologist.
I want to live in Europe, I want to work at a bakery or a book shop and write and paint.
I want to work on human rights issues, support women, stand up for LGBTQ people , support children, end racism.
I want to live in an eichler/mid century modern home in Walnut Creek. I want to keep all the windows open in the Spring. Run a book club out of my home. Have a close group of friends that support each other, encourage each other, and are driven to make a difference.
I want to have friends that I can be truly open with. That are responsive and supportive. That are passionate and driven. I want to spend time with friends every week and have fun with them/be silly. I want to know my friends will always have my back and I want to do the same for them.
I want to have a career in something I believe in. I want to help people every day, whether on an individual level, larger level, behind the scenes, or close up. I want to learn biology. I want to read all the time on the beach. I want to cook most days, learn new things and challenge myself.
I want to have a routine I follow every day that helps me be a better person and reach my goals. I want to focus on the little things that make life good, I want to meditate, do yoga, enjoy the ritualistic nature of life, live in nature.
I want to travel the world and meet people, to experience everything and be vulnerable. I want to have kids and teach them to love others, to be open to living a full life and not settling for humdrum. I want to see the world through their eyes, and enjoy every day with them.
I want to learn about web design. Whether this helps in a career way or just makes it so I can make a kick ass blog. I want to have real-life skills so I can have a career if I choose too and I know I can do technical things.
I want to speak to groups of people suffering from mental illness, I want to share my story and tell them there is hope. That I never thought I could get better, that I thought there wasn’t hope for my entire thirty years on earth, but that I found it. It took a long time, but I found it, and things are getting better. I want to help people with mental illness with the little things I needed help with, like grocery shopping, cleaning, preparing meals, or picking outfits/getting ready for the day. I want to go for walks with them and just let them cry on my shoulder or talk.
I want to be a part of something bigger. To work with people that share a common purpose and goal. To encourage people on their journey to being true to themselves and become whole.
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I'll keep you posted on some of the dreams I choose to pursue and my plans to get there.
What are some of your dreams?
xo, C