More Christmas house, etc.

My Dears--

Life putt-putt-hachoos on. It rained last night, is sunny now, and that sort of sums it up. I have been feeling up and down just like this brisk weather.

I have been wanting to be crafty but run out of energy by the time I have a chance to get to making something. The fact that I want to be crafty and not just melt away into nothingness is a good thing, even if it only lasts a minute or two.

I am going to see a new doctor tomorrow to get some help with my pain and exhaustion issues. I hope it goes alright. I am super nervous as my last appointment with a general doctor went horrible. So we'll see.

It's so hard being sick and not being able to do the things I want to do. I want to write, paint and sell my art online. I want to go for walks in the frozen mornings. Bake and cook. Blog daily, and not be so afraid to be alone with my thoughts. I want to sleep well without constant nightmares, and be able to just be a human being. I feel like I am a patient. A slave to my depression and whatever else is going on. It's devastatingly difficult. But hey, it's all I've got.

xx, C


  1. It's really amazing how the weather affects our mood. I am the opposiute of most people though - the cold and snow cheers me up and the warm unseasonable weather makes me sad because I want snow lol

  2. I actually am the same way with the weather. It doesn't snow where we live, but I love rainy and cloudy days way more than sunny ones. :)

  3. I'd say that being able to have the urge to craft and create is definitely a good thing. It means that you know that you have potential (which is obvious from the bits and pieces that you've shared on here) and knowing you have potential means that you know that your worth something :) I think you should hang on to that and focus on it, which it sounds like you're doing. I hope your appointment goes well and you're able to get a handle on things.


  4. Love that felt garland. I hope your appointment goes ok!!!


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