9/11/12

"and I'm telling myself it's gonna be alright" -Patty Griffin


I'm in one of my worst melt-downs. I'm to the point that I just want to give up. This is a bad place to be. I'm trying to hold on and remind myself that bad feelings go away eventually, but the thing is this emptiness doesn't go away. 

My psychiatrist rapidly raised one of my medications, is having me check-in with a phone call each evening, and mentioned hospitalization. I thought I was over this, but I guess I'm not.

I'm so physically and emotionally exhausted. I feel horrible. I keep a lot of these feelings hidden because I don't want anyone to worry about me. I'm also afraid of being abandoned or written off as crazy if I'm truly honest about how bad things are and the things I am thinking.

I am so mad that depression and mental illness has totally ravaged my life. It breaks my sad heart.

Good thoughts are appreciated. 

xx, C



3 comments:

  1. It will be okay... It will be okay... It will be okay...

    You are in my prayers, my thoughts, my heart. Love you

    ReplyDelete
  2. Sending lots of good thoughts. Don't give up.

    ReplyDelete
  3. Sending you love, strength, hugs.
    Thinking good vibes, prayers...
    Stay strong C.

    ReplyDelete

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