gratuitous cute dog photo.

I'm returning to the blog. I'm trying to do everything I can to improve my chances of surviving this depression. So here we go...

This morning I went for a walk with R, and two of the pups. The trees were amazing in different shades of green and we caught the cool morning air before the Summer swelter. I feel nauseas, nervous, tired. I have therapy tomorrow, ECT Friday, and DBT Saturday (so many acronyms). My recovery and survival is my only focus. It takes a lot of work! But I'm hoping it pays off, I'm hoping I survive this. This is the hardest battle I've ever faced. But I'm one determined motherfucker, and I'm not giving up without a fight.

Due to ECT, I can't drive right now. All I want to do is drive and go shopping! Tonight we are going to dinner with some of R's work colleagues and I am thinking of dressing up and wearing makeup for the first time in months! I think it will be a good boost to my self-esteem to do something normal. 

I'm a bit rusty at this, but I'll try to keep it up.

xo, C