2/6/17

survival

Hi Friends,

I am feeling pretty damn awful. The depression has gotten worse and I cry all the time. I am on Lithium now and it hasn't been helping one bit. We aren't sure what to do next but for now I'm just trying to cope until therapy on Thursday.

I'm very tired. Physically tired, soul tired, emotionally tired, brain tired. Sleep doesn't help me feel any more rested. Instead I wake up feeling hungover. It's been rough and I thought 2017 was going to be better.

Ronald has been great. Extra snuggles this weekend and care. I wake in the night crying because I am so sad and hopeless, he wakes up and rubs my back. Love him. He also does all the chores as my fibromyalgia has been horrible, to the point that I can hardly shower. I think I married the best guy on earth.

I wish I had something good and fun to talk about, but we are just in a horrible place right now. It's so sad. I'm so stressed about money as Cricket's vet bills really piled up, and she has ongoing treatment we have to cover. We've cut back on any extra spending so we'll be ok after awhile but I just hope nothing else goes wrong or we'll be totally screwed.

I'm reading a good book about Paris. I'm thankful for sweatpants and cozy blankets. I adore R and these pups more than anything. I want to learn to read tarot and palms. We've started burning incense and it's lovely. Every night R makes me a fire so I can stay really warm for my fibro. We have a little bit of chocolate in the house, and a lot of whiskey. And I'm hoping we'll get through this bout.

xo, C



1 comment:

  1. I'm really sorry you're having such a tough time, love. <3 Thinking of you.

    ReplyDelete

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