morning things

I am most productive and yet most depressed in the mornings. I don't know how that works. I think I get to doing things to avoid how unbelievably sad I feel. 

Things are still really up and down. I have a few good moments followed by a sudden onset of suicidal thoughts or really awful anxiety, and then I start to feel better again.

Yesterday R got me flowers on his way home from work. They are gorgeous and he is the sweetest.

He is with me this weekend which is wonderful. We are going to decorate the house. Since we have painted we haven't put anything on the walls, so it's way overdue. 

Anyway, it's time to get the day started.

Love, C

1 comment:

  1. I adore your blog. I too am wresting with the same issues, and I know sometimes it helps to have a friend to chat with. I am at both my best and my worst in the mornings, and it's hard to explain to people who don't have depression and anxiety. I was recently DENIED health insurance coverage because of it, as well as my weight not being appropriate for the BMI. WHAT A BUNCH OF SHIT. I'd love to become pals, if not friends! I'm always here for you...


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